Every great disappointment I have faced, every heartache, every hurt, every betrayal that has come my way, is when I have placed my own expectations on someone else. While some things I consider basic common courtesy or human decency, the fact remains that everyone does not have the same values as I do.
We each have our own set of guiding principles in life, from the small things like showing up on time, to be kind to one another, be authentic, to the big things like, don’t lie, steal or cheat, but the second we place our set of expectations on someone else, we are setting ourselves up to be hurt. So, all we can do is hold ourselves to our highest standard and when it comes to others, hope for the best, prepare for the worst.
Now, this doesn’t mean we are giving people a screw over me, free day. What it does is to help us create boundaries of what we are and are not willing to accept from others. It simply means that we stop putting ourselves in a position to be let down and hurt when others don’t meet our expectations.
Let me put it this way, we still have our set of standards of behaviors, but we already know that some people won’t be able to meet those standards. But we keep imposing our standards and expectations on them, and we keep getting hurt and disappointed. At some point, we must lower our expectation of them or sever ties with them. In the end, it is about what we are and are not willing to accept from others, and that is a choice that you will have to make. We must do what is best for us, and sometimes you have to let some things go and move on with life. But, that’s up to you and you alone.