Your Healing Is Not in the Words “I’m Sorry.”

Why are we waiting for an apology that we don’t even need? Most apologies are really on a surface level anyways. Apologizing has become almost a knee-jerk reaction. But, yet we still demand them, even when we know that they are not sincere, there is no remorse behind it and it carries little or no importance.

Why is it so important to us that we get an apology? I am glad you asked because we want the person to acknowledge the infraction and its impact it had on us. I understand that your pain wants to be heard, I understand that your pain will continue to scream until it is recognized. I got all of that. But, we must also understand that an apology can never undo what was done. It is not like it is one of those magic erasers, that can then remove any harsh words or scathing actions. But, we still demand an apology.

Look, no apology will ever be good enough to put an end to the pain and reverse the damage. What I have learned is that you can’t outsource your healing. You must go through the process for yourself. When you wait for an apology, before you can start your healing process, you are allowing the person who harmed you to continue to harm you. You are letting them decide when the process should begin.

Do we need an apology? It would be nice, but if one is never received, move on and most importantly heal thyself. Stop thinking that your healing begins with an apology. An apology will not erase what has happened, once you realize that, it becomes easier to let go of your driving need for acknowledgment and restitution. Their inability to accept responsibility is their problem and not yours. The only thing that you are responsible for, is your healing. Accept that and move on.

Remember this, your happiness should not hinge on somebody else’s inadequacies. It’s just a thought. Paul Steven Smith (Uncle Paul) www.unclepaulsthoughts.com